“Hey..stop..”

“Hey..stop”

My cousin and I formed a triad with the attacker to defend ourselves.

Half his face was hanging out, and it seemed his mental faculties were challenged.

The threat was real.

“I am not a monster.”

That line calmed us down. We didn’t expect such drama in our routine walk.

He then came closer and said, “I saw you both walk this route yesterday.”

“I was planning to introduce myself, but people think I am a monster because of my face.”

We gave him a sly smile, unsure whether to contradict his truth and keep him away from regrets.

When I hear the word regret, the cliché of the celebrity types repeating the old adage, “No regrets! If I had a life again – I would have no regrets for the choices I made,” comes to my mind.

We all have regrets. I can count at least 12.

1. Regrets of worrying about what others would say.
2. Regrets of worrying about what others would think.
3. Regrets for putting my emotional well-being on my parents’ image of me.
4. Regrets of having a primitive understanding of what it takes to excel at the highest
5. Regrets of not understanding that for any relationship, they want to be heard.
6. Regrets that not everyone wants the truth. They want to feel loved. They want an assurance that the world is fair.  
7. Regrets of wasting hours on stories – religious and societal that were meaningless and kept me from living a full life.
8. Regrets of not chasing the follies of the youth. Being too serious with career and life goals. Now, I am too old to look like a fool.
9. Regrets of not pursuing arts after bombing first time on stage.
10. Regrets of not seeing myself for my uniqueness and measuring myself to the wrong crowd;the wrong metrics.  
11. Regrets of not recognizing the true meaning of life are when you serve others with earnestness.
12. Regrets for not understanding that the ‘prize’ becomes another house, another car, another trophy that has no meaning left. 

We create meaning from the meaningless ‘artifact.’

But no regrets are as consequential as turning your head at the wrong time.

“What happened,” we asked.

“I remember it as if it was yesterday,” he said with deep introspection and sorrow.

“My friends and I, after a political rally, were on our bikes. 

One of my friends called my name from back. 

I turned for 3 seconds. 

Just 3 seconds. 

I hit an electricity post head-on. 

I was in the hospital for 3 months. 

The doctor declared me ‘nearly dead’ five times. 

But I didn’t die. 

My mother couldn’t pay the bills, so she took me home. 

I still remember 1992." 

I regret turning back.